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som
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 Posted: Sun Mar 02, 2008 5:39 am Post subject: How to keep yourself calm? |
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Super Newbie
Joined: Dec 06, 2007
Posts: 9
Location: Bangalore
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Can anyone tell me ways to deal with anger. 
I have loads of work to do and an uncontrollable brat to lookafter at home. Trying to balance between the work and my little one, i endup getting angry on small things and then feel guilty later on.
i really want to put an end to this and want to control my anger. Please help.
thank you. |
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rajni7
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| Posted: Sun Mar 02, 2008 12:19 pm Post subject: |
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Super Newbie
Joined: Mar 02, 2008
Posts: 3
Location: India
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Som, let me tell you that anger is perhaps the most difficult emotion to handle. When you are angry, your rational mind stops working. You have to continuously manage it!
But, I can give one small advise - when you are angry become aware of this fact that you are angry, take a few breaths and wait for the anger to subside before reacting.
Particularly with kids, you have to be very very patient.
I will refer you to this article on Psychology Today - . The Lion TamerI hope it helps you in understanding yourself.
Good luck!
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Lark
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| Posted: Tue Mar 04, 2008 6:12 am Post subject: |
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Writer of the Year
Joined: Nov 01, 2006
Posts: 209
Location: U.K.
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| I found that whilst looking after children if it gets too bad, make a change to what ever they were doing, ie give them something else to do something creative usually works, I always kept a bag of bits of card ribbons etc and got this out, if that fails get them outside for a short walk, fresh air and exercise tires them out and hopefully they go to bed on time, if they are old enough to be left or someone else can look after them, then it was me who went for a power walk to diffuse my anger, still do that when stroppy teenager gets mad! |
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preciousGem
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| Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 1:36 am Post subject: |
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Official member
Joined: Dec 09, 2007
Posts: 39
Location: asia
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im facing same situation , though is gets difficult to control this emotion , but one has to , i think we should try to manage between work and kids , we shouldnt be obssessed , try to adjust our selves . kids are but kids , very fragile n since we are mature enough so we should control our temper,though its very hard but not impossible.. with smiles .
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When a woman tells the truth she is creating the possibility for more truth around her . |
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TheRadiantSeraphim
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| Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 6:53 pm Post subject: |
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visiting addict
Joined: Sep 04, 2007
Posts: 96
Location: In a pile of books.
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One thing that has been helping me is meditation and being mindful of when I get angry. When I am mindful of my emotions, I am more able to back away and as someone already said, take some deep breaths. Then I can feel less worried about the situation in general.
When I meditate, I do not worry about rigid rules of meditation, for focusing too much on those rules can make the meditation counter productive since it puts you in a state of worry. I basically place myself in a comfortable position, relax my muscles, slowly breathe, and focus on either a mantra verse or a peaceful imagery, or both. Sometimes even focusing on a theme (such as compassion or something considered peaceful) might be an okay focus object. Do not get too preoccupied with the rules, or you end up not relaxing, is all I can suggest.
Also do not worry yourself if you see images of other things popping into your head (e.g., when thoughts cross your mind). These things happen. Do not focus too much on pushing them out, or they might just get stronger and you lose relaxation period.
Mind you, I have only been regulatly meditating for a few months now...but I been feeling less controlled by my impulses as a result.
After some things clear out of the way in my real life, I might actually consider doing research on the effectiveness of meditation.
Sincerely,
TheRadiantSeraphim |
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Sheri1969
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| Posted: Sat Apr 26, 2008 10:32 pm Post subject: |
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Women of Faith
Joined: Nov 30, 2005
Posts: 298
Location: Ontario Canada
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Ways I deal with anger are the same ways I deal with stress, anxiety, depression.... You get the idea. I write, paint, sketch, crochet, knifty knit, scrapbook, cuddle with my cat, nap, walk, exercise, clean, call a friend, go out, call a crisis line, write in a journal, do my email, listen to music. I have a huge list of things I've collected from the internet - HUGE - if you'd like me to post it. I do everything in my power. Bath, shower, meditation, read, pray, work on the puter, write out how I am feeling, what I am feeling, etc. Hope this helps.
Sheri
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Sheri Liegh Adams
Jesus Never Fails! |
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