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| Not really a rant and rave, but something to confess... |
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TheRadiantSeraphim
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 Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 12:47 am Post subject: Not really a rant and rave, but something to confess... |
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visiting addict
Joined: Sep 04, 2007
Posts: 95
Location: In a pile of books.
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Hello,
This is not a rant and rave, nor a self-humiliation post or a cry for attention, but there has been something I been somewhat keeping from the group that I need to get off my chest, after I seen things are friendly enough.
I hinted at it before, and I am quite novice of a practitioner and still am beginning to learn more of the culture, but I moreso consider myself a Shaktini, a devout of the Shakta Religion, a branch of Hinduism. I hesitated saying it completely before because I worried that I would not be so welcomed, and I did not want to make anyone afraid of me because of my beliefs. Since I have not been formally initiated or have full knowledge of the culture, I also felt uncomfortable calling myself a Hindu, even if I agree with the general tenets. I suppose some could say I am a "Neo-Hindu" of the Shakta Religion. I am not fully versed in Sanskrit and all of the literature out there, and have yet to have formal initiation. But it is what lies within the heart, yes?
This is not even something I really talk about in the real world with many people, since I live in the Midwest of the United States, and in an area where ethnocentrism and religious fundamentalism is fairly strong. But I have no ill-will toward my Christian brothers and sisters, either. Even before I came to this realization of myself, I had problems with persecution in some form or another. So I tend to try to feel things out before opening up in general.
At any rate, I hope nothing negative comes out of me walking out of the closet. I really enjoyed my stay here so far, and wish I could contribute more so I can help provide feedback to fellow writers (and possibly hash out some of my own writing, heh)...but my university studies take a major priority. And I wish to take the time to thank Rose and the administration, as well as staff, for making such a wonderful community possible. If I had more money at the moment to spare, I would definitely show my thanks through that and not through just words alone.
:::bows:::
Sincerely,
TheRadiantSeraphim |
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Cparker
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| Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 6:27 am Post subject: |
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Monkey Boy
Joined: Sep 26, 2004
Posts: 623
Location: Portugal/London
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No problem at all, I'm sure everyone here enjoys diversity  So when did you realise that you wanted to become a Hindu? Were you brought up within any other religion and decide it wasn't for you?
_________________
Teal´c : To resist the influence of others, knowledge of oneself is most important. |
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TheRadiantSeraphim
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| Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 10:12 am Post subject: |
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visiting addict
Joined: Sep 04, 2007
Posts: 95
Location: In a pile of books.
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It was actually since 2004, but I was having some real life problems and then suddenly forgot to fulfill my spiritual side; I also had a very unhealthy mindset that since I was not formally inducted in the tradition, that I felt unworthy to practice it, or that I needed to be very ritualistic when trying to be more spiritual. Prior to that, I just believed in God but I could not call myself a Christian because I did not agree with the strict version of the doctrine, even if I respected Jesus' teachings and thought he was divine. But otherwise, I only knew as much about Hinduism as I did after reading Linda Johnsen's "Complete Idiot's Guide to Hinduism", the Upanishads, portions of the Vedas, the Bhagavad Gita, portions of the Devi Mahatmyam, fragments of the History of the Shakta Religion (cannot remember the author's name), and the Ramayana. I still to this day am not versed in Sanskrit (so I rely on translations and a few terms) and I am still learning a great deal to this day, every day.
Then a Shakta talked to me and suggested that I did not have to worry so much about these things, and that Devi (most Shaktas call God by God/dess, but it is believed that all gods are one God) loved her children all the same...then made a light-hearted joke that she spoke in as many languages as there existed and many more; that even they do not know every literature out there (as there are many); and that was then I realized I was silly to rely so much on the external world and that I should have been trying to fulfill my spirituality with or without formal indoctrination into the faith - if it is meant to be, I will be found. They also suggested another alternative to my fixed idea that I needed to participate in formal ritual. My university studies came first, that will help me become a successful clinical psychologist, so I may "formally" begin my duty to help everyone; I been struggling with depression all of my life, and instead of trying to just accept it, I been trying to cope with it and then hope to one day, help others so that they do not have to endure the pain that I have. What I began to do was just pray to God/dess, and talk to my ishta devata (personal deity, it acts as a manifestation of God's will akin to a guardian angel in Christianity), at least in the morning and at night...or whenever I felt the need. Then whenever I do a task, I think of him/her/it. It has been helpful to me thus far in combating my depression.
I still regularly talk to this fellow Shakta, although they are not really my human guru, per se. They just help me understand the Shakta perspective of things better.
I was baptised a Roman Catholic, but I just felt that strict Christianity did not really fit me. It was not that I did not believe in God, I just did not believe in eternal damnation or that non-Christians were unable to find Heaven. With all of the problems we had in this world, and with all of the confusion that existed, I did not think a loving God would frown on someone for not knowing a name, or not saying a name. We have so much culture and diversity that it just seemed awkward that we had to only know one to be saved - this was at least how I was viewing it. I also know some Christians feel similarly, but come from more laid-back backgrounds and also felt comfortable in their church. Essentially, I felt incomplete and sought more. Other events in life just hinted me toward learning more about Hinduism. I also respected some of the core principles in it, such as the concept of all gods being the same God, and that good and evil was not determined by the god worshiped but rather the selfishness, desire, greed, etc of the ego and what the asuras (type of demon) represented in literature. Of course, the beauty of the religion is that it is not just one religion, but a family of religions. There are sometimes differences in perspectives, even if minor ones.
To give an example, I seen an interaction between a very conservative Shaivam (a follower of the Shaivite/Shaivism school), and a liberal Shakta on a board. It was not entirely pretty. The Shaivam was very strict and aesthetic in practice, and the Shakta was trying to suggest that non-vegetarians were not bad (this particular Shaivam was strict on the Ayurvedic diet, which essentially, is vegetarian). There were also other differences in beliefs. They over all likely believed in the respect for life, but clearly had different interpretations of what that meant. There are also differences in who they consider more supreme in terms of divinity...such as who preceded who: Shakti or Shiva? To a Shakta, while Shiva's role is not ignored, the motherly aspect was first and is patronized instead of the masculine aspect of God, though anyone can refer to anyone in terms of prayer - I still use masculine words for God in my prayer and even show respect for Jesus Christ. Also, to most Shaivams that I know, maya, the external world, the Material World, is an illusion - to most Shaktas, the world is real and a physical manifestation of divine will, but like anything, must be transcended to be closer to God. There is more to it, but I am trying to simply this paragraph - but for the record, I have seen peaceful interactions between Shaivam and Shaktas, too.
What is interesting is that there really is not any idolatry, despite the many gods (which again are one God) and the statues. The statues are focus items, and God's presence is not entirely limited to them. In fact, when a statue is chipped, a lot of Hindus actually dispose of it and replace it. It is similar to holy symbols and the statues of the Virgin Mary and Jesus Christ in this aspect. All good-hearted Catholics know that those are not God, but the Virgin Mary played an important role in the New Testament and Jesus Christ's teachings are what they intend to epitomize. Does this make any sense?
Eish, I made this post longer than I intended! Either way, do not dub me an expert on this by this post. This is not only just one viewpoint, but one viewpoint that is still learning and gathering information! :-)
And I thank you for not belittling me for my beliefs. I really am content to be in a community with tolerance and where I feel a sense of unity in diversity and respect.
Sincerely,
TheRadiantSeraphim |
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